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Friday, September 30, 2005

If they pounded rocks, they'd just get a headache...

If this doesn’t leap off the page at you, you’ve just been walking through life not paying attention.

:-)

“Our daily life is mostly, made of cases in which we lose money and/or time and/or energy and/or appetite, cheerfulness and good health because of the improbable action of some preposterous creature who has nothing to gain and indeed gains nothing from causing us embarrassment, difficulties or harm. Nobody knows, understands or can possibly explain why that preposterous creature does what he does. In fact there is no explanation - or better there is only one explanation: the person in question is stupid.”


So writes Carlo M. Cipolla  as he explains the third of his BASIC LAWS OF HUMAN STUPIDITY.

Read the whole thing. There will be a test. In fact there will likely be several. Daily. For the rest of your natural born life…

*sigh*

h.t. Jerry Pournelle's Current Mail.

Listen with your heart

Yes, bring the troops home, but bring 'em home the right way: home victorious and to a home that welcomes them gladly, gratefully. R'cat's post, "Support our troops!" is a powerful reminder of the differences between "us" and "them". It's also a clarion call to keep our military who serve us day in and day out in the forefront of our minds and hearts and prayers. Remember this tribute to the troops from last November? Here's a reminder, even before you CLICK the link (2nd verse and chorus, only)
Homeward Bound If you find it’s me you're missing, if you’re hoping I’ll return. To your thoughts I’ll soon be list’ning, and in the road I’ll stop and turn. Then the wind will set me racing as my journey nears its end. And the path I’ll be retracing when I’m homeward bound again. Bind me not to the pasture, chain me not to the plow. Set me free to find my calling and I’ll return to you somehow. -Music and Lyrics by Marta Keen
Do yourself a favor. Buy the sheet music. Buy a CD with the song. Wear 'em out. This is simply one of the best contemporary pieces of real music out there, and used in this flash presentation with images of our military serving both us and the Iraqis, it's a powerful means of digging deep into our hearts and minds. Here's one source for a recording. (Neat thing: this recording—which I admit I've not yet heard—also includes some other fine tunes like AR HYD Y NOS [All Through the Night] and Simple Gifts.) Or try "The Road Home".
This is the version of the song used in the "Until Then" flash presentation linked above.
While you're at GCS Distributing, check out Still Here, another moving tribute to the troops. Link to these and others you find. (If this one doesn't choke you up, move you to awe at the service of our troops "then and now" and compel you to express your respect and gratitude then I just don't want to know you... ) Let the images and the music form messages to build powerful hooks into your heart and mind to help remind you to keep those who are serving you in the forefront of your thoughts. To quote a more eloquent voice than mine,
"Respect them. Honor them. Cherish them... They guard our freedom, and they have purchased the freedom of countless millions with their dearest blood."
Crossposted at Cathouse Chat

Thursday, September 29, 2005

This space left intentionally blank

Cos it's past time for me to be racked out, that's why.

Stalking the wild moonbat

The Precision Guided Humor Assignment for this week is, “What should you bring with you to protest an anti-war rally?”

When you think about it for a second or three, that’s really a silly question. Who’s going to see your protest of the “protest”? Self-made idiots of the Loony Left Moonbat Brigade there to celebrate their braindead embrace of anti-war rhetoric, Mass Media Podpeople (also self-made idiots) or people who already agree that the other two classes of creatures that may once have been human are now devolved or replaced by Podpeople from the planet “Reality-Based Fantasia”. The first two classes of beings will not be impacted at all by your protest and the latter class have lives to live, people to feed, bills to pay, etc., and have little time for such foolishness.

If, however, you want to spend some time viewing barking moonbats in their natural habitat for pleasure or education, here are a few of the items you MUST take with you:


A good gas mask.  It’s the stench of unwashed bodies, you know.
MilitarypatchSome heavy-duty insect repellent. Lice, fleas, etc. on unwashed moonbats. (Oh, and the rest of the gear pictured might not be such a bad idea, either. Barking moonbats have been known to throw hissy-fits, and they scratch and bite something fierce.)

You might consider having one of these standing by, as well, a Mobile Topical Applicator and Inhabitant Delouser:
And even with a gas mask, you may well need one of these:barf-bag This post listed for Dinner at Basil's Blog.

Permanently set to "Utter"

Media_BS Thanks to Bohemian Like You, we finally have a useful guide for Mass Media Podpeople BS warnings...

Roberts Confirmed

One down… four to go?  :-)

Roberts was confirmed by better than a 75% margin. Who revealed their petty partisanship and deepset moonbattery to vote against him? Only Democrats voted “No” and only the following Democrats

Akaka, Hawaii; Bayh, Ind.; Biden, Del.; Boxer, Calif.; Cantwell, Wash.; Clinton, N.Y.; Corzine, N.J.; Dayton, Minn.; Durbin, Ill.; Feinstein, Calif.; Harkin, Iowa; Inouye, Hawaii; Kennedy, Mass.; Kerry, Mass.; Lautenberg, N.J.; Mikulski, Md.; Obama, Ill.; Reed, R.I.; Reid, Nev.; Sarbanes, Md.; Schumer, N.Y.; Stabenow, Mich.


Note those names well: not one had a legitmate reason to vote against Roberts’ confirmation.  All were driven by political hackery, venality and barking moonbat ideology. If even one had raised an issue of substance, I’d not make such a claim, but since not one single word or written release by any one of those “No” votes reflected anything but political hackery, venality or barking moonbat ideology (or in bizarre cases such as Kerry, Kennedy and Reid, all three), I feel safe in saying that the above collection of poltroons needs an intimate introduction to the tender ministrations of Dr. Tarr and Mr. Fether. (Although I doubt even therapy by such renowned p-sych dumbologists could penetrate the layers of B.S. this list spews on a daily basis… )

Celebrate the season...

Get out yer copy of “O Blessed Holy Caffeine Tree” (score here, practice track here :-) and sing along: it’s National Coffee day… again.

Christine, of Morning Coffee and Afternoon Tea, once again notes National Coffee Day.  Of course, she noted another coffee day in July, as well, and makes special note of coffee days in various other countries, so we can celebrate the Holy Brew on many occasions.  Heck, forget that.  I’m making Coffee Day a 365.25-day-per-year holiday.  A coupla cups and I’m in a celebratory mood, anyway.
Update already... heh—Kat of Keep the Coffee Coming has her Coffee Day post up, too, and she supplements it with a coupla songs, one from John McCutcheon and one from Lacy J. Dalton (and I agree, Kat, about the cream. :-)

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Let's introduce the ACLU to Dr. tarr and Mr. Fether, shall we? Hmmm?

ACLU=All Criminal Libertines Union?

Could be.  All it takes is one example to demonstrate that the ACLU doesn’t care whether you are informed of registered sex offenders living near you but in fact wants such predators to live where they want in stealth mode. Well, I’ll stop at just two: _1_ _2_.

Seems fitting for a group that sides with men who seek to promote sex with boys. Also here and here.

Want more reasons to run the ACLU outa town? Just CLICK the graphic and check out the other blogs noting some of the many ways the ACLU works to make our society less civilized.

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This was a production of Stop The ACLU blogburst.  Over 100 blogs are already on board.  If you want to join us, just register through our portal.  We will add you to our mailing list, and send you the info on how to get aboard and fight the ACLU.


"NOLA contendere"

Via Michelle Malkin, comes this lil bit on New Orleans conflicts. Heh, New Orleans: the entertainment capitol of government incompetents.

NOLA Mayor Ray Nagin and police superintendent Eddie Compass compounded the monumental idiocy of Governor during Katrina and prove that they are the gift that keeps on giving. After a press conference where Compass belatedly hung up his spurs, Nagin refused to answer questions, instead blowing off even email queries with
"No comment," Nagin wrote. "The chief asks everyone to respect his privacy. He requested the press conference be held the way it was handled. He is a good man. Don't mess with him!"

Good man.  Lousy police superintendent.  Gee, since he was taking money for a job he was incompetent to do (and thus did not do), he is a thief. That doesn’t fit with the average joe’s definition of a “good man,” but then Nagin’s a politician, and a NOLA politician at that. Taking the bucks for NOT doing the job just seems to be standard practice there.

Dissing Congresscritters

Beldarblog is written by a Houston area lawyer who mostly fizzled out for a while after the 2004 election, but has come back with some great stuff in recent months. This lil snippet, written in the wake of Rita, is priceless:

I'd a whole lot rather listen to the second assistant deputy chief fire marshall for Hedwig Village at a Hurricane Rita press conference than to any CongressCritter of either party.
The CongressCritters ought to have to wear placards around their necks — or maybe better yet, those sashes, like beauty pageant contestants wear — labeled with phrases like:
  • "Useless Panderer"

  • "Only Here for the Graft"

  • "Harbors Delusions of Relevance" or

  • "Do You KNOW Who I Am? (And why should care right now?)"

Sounds about right to me.  How about adding,

porkbusters Note: added the link to the Spam Song, cos, well, it's sooooo appropriate.

I'm for Victory

Victory with a BIG ole “V

Those of y’all who read this blog regularly have figured out by now that

  • I am no fan of the Iraq War

  • I believe we can win there and that we have a moral imperative to win.

Seem like contradictory stances? They aren’t.  As I have said before, were I in our leaders’ shoes, I’d have adjudged Iraq to have been the wrong place and time for another armed conflict, even though I know from the facts on hand now (as well as when Jean Fraud sKerry voted to send the troops, then voted not to fund them) that there was much more than adequate cassus belli for the war.

And I’d have shot Bremmer before sending him in after the major push was over.  What an idiot—and I say that based on his record.

I’d have spent the $300,000,000,000 and counting on things I consider to be more profitable for our security, even given the fact that I openly applaud the great things already accomplished in this ME adventure and recognize that when the terrorists have to resort to shanghai-ing unwilling victims to be human bombs, we are bleeding the terrorists dry over there, rather than having them go all splodydope on us here.

Regardless of how we got there, or what missteps have been made along the way, whatever has been accomplished so far will have been blood and treasure poured down a sinkhole if we leave before the job is done.  And leaving without Victory will do more than anything else to encourage more 9/11 behavior from Islamic fascist savages.

In terms even a barking moonbat ought to be able to understand (but will refuse to understand), one shoots rabid dogs.  One does not back away (or run away) after offering them a cookie.

And that’s why one of the very few (4) graphics at the head of my blog is linked to this post:

victory Modded after a note from NAP urging me to go ahead and use her code (even though I modded it here and in my head--no, my blog head, sillies. *sigh* Readers. Gotta love 'em. :-)

Get This!

No, really: get this book! The FairTax Book I have blogged elsewhere a couple of times ( _1_, _2_) about this book and the bill now in Congress that it details. I've also posted sporadically on the issue of taxation. This book, and the bill it explains, answers almost all the issues I have with the taxation situation in the U.S. The FairTax is NOT the "Flat Tax". It is designed to replace all the federal payroll/income taxes you now pay (including Social Security and Medicare). More fairly. More efficiently. More helpfully—for individuals and the country as a whole. And still fully fund all current federal government agencies and programs. Check out the Fairtax.org website for some advance info while you're waiting on your copy to get to you from Amazon.com. :-) And after you read your copy, consider signing up for one of the Fairtax mailing lists. The one for my home state has been a big encouragement to me, and a source of more information about how others are dealing with their congresscritters on this issue. It's time for taxes to be fair. FairTax. Crossposted at Cathouse Chat

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Curry-their-favor ChickenRice

Curry-their-favor ChickenRice

Did this for tonight’s dinner, kinda last-minute, throwing stuff together. This is note so much a “recipe” as a log of what went into the pan tonight. Modify freely:

Ingredients:
2 large boneless chicken breasts, “chunked” (cut into chunky pieces)
1 cup rice
1 Roma tomato, chunked
1/2 small onion, diced
1 clove garlic, minced finely (or thru your garlic press)
olive oil
salt/pepper
1Tbs curry powder
some green, banana or other mild peppers, chopped
dash or two of balsamic vinegar (it was out, I saw it and thought, “Why not?” Was good.)


Heat 10” cast iron skillet to medium-medium hot  Salt and pepper the chicken chunks. Oil in the hot pan.  Add chicken. When the chicken is white on all sides, add the garlic, onion, peppers and balsamic vinegar.  When the onion is clarified, add the curry powder and keep stirring it off the bottom of the pan re-coating the chicken.  Add the rice and fry it until it begins to “pop” a little, maybe even brown a tad. Add the water and tomato and bring it to a boil. Back it off to a simmer and cover.  About 20 minutes or so later, yum!


Nothing but sKerry B.S.

Well, Jean Fraud sKerry (for some reason he still insists on going by his nickname, “John Kerry”) is still counting on just letting his lies, damned lies and sKerryisms just fade away. The counter waiting on his release of the records he “faux-released” (only some records to friendly outlets that’ve released only select items) is still counting in my sidebar.

*sigh*

Let’s “delaborate” this process a bit, shall well [sic, sic, sic--was supposed to be "shall we" *sigh*]?  Bubba,

No More sKerry Bullshit2

Monday, September 26, 2005

Back in the Saddle again (sample)

Here's a sample of Gene Autry's signature song (Album available at PMRS)

Powered by Castpost
Yeh, this one's in appreciation of the fact that Diane's sent a report (via Mel) that her evacuation from Baytown, TX not only went safely but that she's on her way home, now and will likely be "Back in the Saddle" blogging by Wednesday or so. Good news. Pray for safe trips for all those returning to homes, and for their recovery from whatever Rita effects their homes may have experienced. Glad this one wasn't worse.

Browser Wars, Part D'oh

FWIW… eWeek reports:
More Security Holes Found in Firefox

Symantec reports that 18 high-severity vulnerabilities were
reported for the Mozilla browser in the first half of 2005,
10 more than reported for IE.”
Of course, that lil squib doesn’t necessarily address other issues. For example, the vulnerabilities found in IE are often more severe because of the fairly deep hooks Internet Exploder has in the OS (and the overall bloated, crappy browser implementation in Internet Exploder). Then, of course, there’s the fact that Firefox’s vulnerabilities are usually patched expeditiously, instead of at the nearly glacial “speed” Microsoft applies to patching IE/Windows vulnerabilities.

But who really cares? Opera had far, far fewer security issues than either Firefoxed or Internet Exploder. And patched them faster than either of the other two, as well.

Ho. Hum.

:-)


Guard the Borders! (a few resources)

Stop Illegal Immigration! (Let's just call it what it is, shall we? Stop Border Outlaws! heh) Here are a (very) few of the organizations and resources concerned citizens are manning: California Border Police Initiative A site seeking to promote the organization of a new state police force in California strictly for the purpose of enforcing California's border against illegal immigration: "It's time to stop complaining about Washington not doing its job. It's time to ENFORCE THE LAW and PROTECT OUR OWN BORDER..." An interesting idea. FAIR: Federation for American Immigration Reform "FAIR seeks to improve border security, to stop illegal immigration, and to promote immigration levels consistent with the national interest—more traditional rates of about 300,000 a year." IllegalAliens.US "This site, besides mocking the term undocumented, is an illegal immigration primer whose goal is to provide information on illegal immigration prevention, enforcement, and attrition." IllegalAliens.US has a sister site, Report Illegals that offers a one-stop form "...to report illegal aliens ('undocumented immigrants') and illegal employers to the appropriate U.S. government agencies." A few more: ProjectUSA Americans for Immigration Control American Immigration Control Foundation Coalition for the Future American Worker English First 9/11 Families for a Secure America These are literally just a few of the many sites and resources available. Explore them. Consider the information they present. Discover just what a serious issue this is and make a committment to become in involved: Guard the Borders! Blogs on Board: ---------- This has been a production of the Guard the Borders Blogburst, held every Monday at Euphoric Reality and other blogs. Our mission is to keep immigration issues at the forefront. If you'd like to be a part of it, send your blog URL and name to kit.jarrell@ gmail dot com. -------------

Sunday, September 25, 2005

A rose by any other name?

Well, she can’t seem to make up her mind what to call her blog (Just a Girl, now ;-), but Mel has the scoop on the inane names celebs gave their kids.

Hey, Mel: maybe they’re just trying to capture the real essence of the person. You know, like Gwyneth Paltrow wants her kid’s name to say “Bite me!” or something… I dunno, maybe the kid's nickname can be "Sauce" or "pie a la mode"—heh

Just reading on through her blog, I hadda ask myself why I hadn’t blogrolled her yet.  Well, apart from the obvious, “What’s she calling her blog this week?” issue… (Just kidding, Mel. :-) Oh, as long as I’m noting new-to-my-blogroll blogs, how about that Mauser Girl? Heh.  You just have to check out the G.I. Love Chocolate Ice Cream.

Saturday, September 24, 2005

B-b-b-blog flog!

Seen Dafydd ab Hugh's new  blog, Big Lizards?

Well, what are you waiting for? Get outa here and go check it out! Well? GO!

(Sheesh… some people. ;-)

Oh, BTW (what a thing to forget—guess I was in a hurry earlier)—thanks to Romeocat for the reminder. I had visited Big Lizards earlier this week, meant to go back and just flat lost track of it. *sigh*

Disaster Preparedness-on a small scale

In the wake of Katrina especially, more folks are thinking through what they might do if some sort of disaster struck their community...

Dean Ing is my go-to guy in that arena. He's the kinda guy who can rehabilitate the pejorated term "survivalist" all by his lonesome with his down-to-earth approach to self-sufficiency.

I often recommend his novel, Pulling Through, as a painless way to be introduced to preparing for disaster (while not being caught up in some silly "Chicken Little" soap opera.) If you don't need the fictional sugar to take some preparedness medicine, his OOP book, The Chernobyl Syndrome would fit the bill nicely as a comprehensive overview of small-scale, personal disaster preparedness. The link above is to four amazon.com affiliated selers who each have a copy of the hardback for sale. That's not a lot of availablity, eh? I can tell you that I'm not selling my paperback copy!

A good thing about the book is Ing's virtually painless "hobbyist" approach to self-sufficiency/disaster preparedness/survivalism. I think most of the readers of this blog would find his approach fun, if nothing else, and—what the heck!—you'd end up being more prepared to survive a disaster than probably 99% of Americans.

(Pulling Through is also available from some private sellers via amazon.com, and The Rackham Files—featuring more in a similar vein—

is available from amazon.com and from Baen Books, directly.) [UPDATE: I had read the first two chapters of The Rackham Files in an online preview. Just got the book.
    Pulling Through
is included in it. Oh, and note the books were written in the 1980s (so references to political issues may be out of date) but are nevertheless pretty good disaster relief primers.

Friday, September 23, 2005

LOL--ROFKMITB

That last is "rolling on floor kicking myself in the butt" Such a delish Chiles Rellenos recipe I posted for the Carnival of the Recipes this week... And then didn't submit to the Carnival. Oh. Well. OH! Can stop kicking myself, now: this just in from SWWBO:
September 21, 2005 Important Announcement Okay- from now on, the Carnival of the Recipes' deadline for recipes sent to recipe dot carnival at gmail dot com is noon Central on Saturdays. Whoever is hosting can have it up anytime on Saturday or Sunday of their week. I was stuck on stupid thinking that I (or anyone else) could easily put it together on a Friday morning!!!!
:-)

Yeh, yeh: just see what TMH's Bacon Bits has on this one

Just go. RBGEarsF

Catch "what's hot!"

Rich, The English Guy, has another blog that I’d missed (how many do you have, anyway, fella? ;-). Cool! what’s hot! Is a neat place to stop by and check out! Man, Rich, I don’t know how I missed the banner announcement! (Must be early oldtimers’ disease *sigh*)

Reparations

Justa thought (courtesy of The Cave of Adullum): during the 16th/17th century slave trade, somewhere around 600,000 to 650,000* African slaves were transported to what is now the United States (although some were transported to French and Spanish territory, now U.S.).  During that same time, Muslims captured and took to Africa as slaves, between 1,000,000 and 1,250,000 Europeans.

I’m sure that had some kind of deleterious effect upon my European ancestors.  I want reparations. The Saudis have deep pockets. Let's all sue them. *note: yeh, there were 10,000,000 or more African slaves taken/transported during the same time frame, but most went elsewhere, not to what turned out to be the territory of the U.S. Brazil? Jamaica and Haiti and Cuba, ya think? Tons. Etc.

Dog Bites Man Redux

Sadly, very sadly, this is not shocking.

If the story (documentation at The Smoking Gun linked above and here) shocks you, you just haven’t been paying attention to this space’s occasional warnings that stupid people (school administrators-duh) are running public schools.

Oh, a preview of the link? How about:

“…Columbus, Ohio public school officials--found only that Wedgewood Middle School educators drank booze during the school day, got kinky with each other in the boiler room bathroom, and spoke about where to score cocaine….”


The ringleader of this lil coven of kink? The principal, of course. A principal who reportedly once told a teacher at the school, “she smoked pot daily en route to school because ‘I can't stand those kids.’ ”

Yeh, well, that’s probably why she was a crappy teacher before she became a crappy administrator. (It’s natural selection, you know: those who can’t teach become school administrators so they can obstruct the efforts of teachers who can teach and children who want to learn.)

h.t. NIF

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Another lil experiment

This is another, different hosting service that's in alpha right now. I have NO idea what's gonna happen when I blog this mp3 file...

Powered by Castpost Hmmm... I think I like this better than the embedding process I had to go through with putfile.com, even though I had to come back and manually edit to add a title for the post. Those of y'all who are regulars will recognize this file as one I posted earlier. Had it handy. Arr copyrighted 2003 DWN--if you hunt down my post listing and find it below, I think I posted a link (somewhere) to the words. 19th century gospel tune. Actually, this was kinda fun to do. I was on a music e-list where someone requested a copy of the sheet music cos an older saint in their church had asked them to find/sing it for her. Found the sheet music (tune/lyrics) and thought, hmmm... I think I've heard some of the old folks around here mention this tune. Sure enough, I had. So, wrote out/recorded this lil thing for them (and for the person who'd requested the sheet music) and that's making a short story long. :-) A quick question: those of y'all using Internet Exploder (The World's Crappiest Browser, as the title bar in myversions read :-), tell me, please, does this load without problems for you or not? One comment I've recieved resulted in my experimental loading of Internet Exploder (the World's Crappiest Browser) to test it, and I had a very unsatisfactory experience with it. Just wanna know how it works/doesn't work for you.

a lil experiment

hosted at putfile.com Now, I'm gonna see if this file will play for a few days or if putfile will delete it for not being accessed the way putfile wants.

Cuckoo for Coco Puffs

Found this at Boudicca’s Voice
I'm Nicola Tesla! Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt!
Which Historical Lunatic Are You?

From Rum and Monkey. Could it be my electric personality?

Stop the ACLU! Petition!

Were you aware that your tax dollars are going to help the ACLU tear down American society? Take just a moment and CLICK on through to the petition linked below. Check out some of my past posts (or those you may find in the Stop the ACLU blogroll) that catalog the ACLU's support of homosexuals who rape young boys or its attacks on moral or religious expression in the public arena. It's your money that supports a lot of this obscene behavior. SIGN THE PETITION TO GET THE ACLU OFF THE TAXPAYER'S DOLE This was a production of Stop The ACLU blogburst. If you would like to join our efforts to fight the ACLU, it's very simple. Just register at our portal. We will add you to our mailing list, and send you the info you will need. Over 100 blogs already on board. Join us!

Chinese Surpass America in Political Snark!

Well, I've been meaning to post on this for a couple of days. Dr. Phat Tony beat me to it yesterday with what I thought was a bang on (heh--it'll be clear in a sec) post on the topic. Today, over at Woody's News and Views I saw something that made me kinda glad I had held off posting. Cos this is priceless.







Unintentional (?) political snark by Chinese. And they owe so much to the Clinton "legacy"... For "the rest of the story" see this.

Pork, pork, pork, pork, porkety-pork...

Sing the Monty Python Spam Song tune to this one…

Re: the myth about Louisiana not getting enough funds to shore up the levees. Here but one of many gotchas that topple that myth… plus a lil more thought candy to boot.  From John Stossel:

“It turns out Louisiana got lots of money for Corps of Engineers projects -- hundreds of millions of dollars more than any other state. Congress just spent it on pork projects instead of on the levees.

I confronted Breaux about his own state's pork, such as subsidies for ship builders and the sugar industry.

‘I object to you using words like squander and pork,’ he said. ‘What is pork in one part of the country is an essential project in another part.’

It's a reason Americans shouldn't filter so much money through Washington. Louisianans don't need Iowa rain forests, and Iowans don't need levees in Louisiana. Maybe the people who want to live in New Orleans should have to pay (through private enterprise or local taxes) the special costs of its exposed location -- or live elsewhere. If all local projects, essential and whimsical, were paid for with local taxes, competition among states and cities would force them to become more efficient.”


Go, read the whole thing. The levee thing’s just the tip of the iceberg.

Equinox

First day of Fall.  

And for a wonder, it’s actually cooler today. Decided to get some early a.m. walk time in. Cool.  Really. Warmer now, but I’ll put some more real miles on the virtual pedometer this afternoon on my way to “adjudicating” an “honors choir” tryout session.  (heh, as if the director didn’t already have her picks set in stone.)

More Federal Jackass Bureaucrappery

Rope. Tree. Some assembly required.

Tons of British aid donated to help Hurricane Katrina victims to be BURNED by Americans

Here’s a pic of the FDA Bureaucrap who made the call:

horses_ass

Truth faith and allegiance=political suicide

Just read Walter Williams’ latest article.  Here’s the nut of the piece:

“There's such a broad ignorance or contempt for constitutional principles among the American people that any politician who bore truth faith and allegiance to the Constitution would commit political suicide.”


Read the whole thing.

Chiles Rellenos—TWC-style

Chiles Rellenos, Third World County™ Style           

6 (green) anaheim or poblano peppers
2 lg. eggs
1/2 tsp. salt, if you want
Monterey Jack cheese, sliced or grated
Flour
Oil

Broil the peppers until their skins are bubbly (you can see them char a bit and even hear them pop sometimes). You'll need to turn them at least once, so watch 'em! Remove the peppers from the oven, and put 'em in a plastic bag. Set 'em aside and let 'em, cool for a while (this would be a good time to start heating your pan, eh?). Peel the outer layer of skin. Slice down one side and remove seeds. Stuff the peppers with cheese (see note below). Beat the eggs with 1/8-1/8 c flour. Add salt. Dip the stuffed peppers into egg mixture. Dredge 'em in flour. Fry them in hot oil until they're golden brown all over.


Sauce:

Take a can of green chiles (or broil and peel some extra green anaheims, then steam, add water, etc.) and puree it. OR just use some canned green enchilada sauce.  Nummies.

Notes:

  • I like the lil extra spiciness of the poblanos as against the milder anaheims. Nice change of pace. YMMV (Poblanos taste kinda like a spicier version of your garden variety bell pepper.)

  • I like to brown some hamburger with LOTS of freshly-ground cumin as seasoning and add that to the pepper stuffing.

  • If you were especially vigorous removing seeds *a-hem*, you may find that pinning the slit on the peppers with some wooden toothpicks then frying and removing the toothpicks will help keep the slits closed.

  • Note the usual warnings about handling peppers apply.  Anaheims and poblanos are both relatively mild peppers, but some folks are more sensitive than others. Keep your hands away from your face until after they’ve been washed and if you’re particularly sensitive, well, why are you making this recipe, anyway?

  • Also, pick peppers with nice, long, sturdy stems, so you can use the stems when dipping/dredging, turning the peppers, etc. Handy.

  • Some like a tomato-based sauce. If you wanna go that way, just about any generic tomato-based pasta sauce will do, if you add some green anaheim chiles to it. Heck, you can even add the browned ground beef/cumin I suggest to that.

  • Also note that for frying these I prefer (in descending order)     
Corn oil Olive oil (watch it! Olive oil won’t take the higher heat corn oil will!) Vegetable oil that does NOT contain soybean oil

Serve this as a part of a Tex-Mex Border-style meal. Rice, refried beans, etc.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Get this book!

The FairTax Book

What else do you need to know?



Well, for more information, you can go to Fairtax.org and even sign up for a mailing list focusing on your state to help you keep on your congresscriters' backs... Plus, the FairTax site has a ton of info for you.

Basically: would you like to be able to still fund the federal gummint at its obscenely bloated level (thus keeping congresscritters, lobbyists—except for those lobbying for tax preparers and their ilk—and bureaucraps placated) but still not end up paying, as you do now, all the income taxes of every business up the supply chain for every product and service you purchase? That'd cut about 23% off the hidden taxes you already pay, BTW.

Would you like to take your WHOLE paycheck home? No more witholding at all?

Still not intrigued? How about no more IRS?

There's more at the site and in the book.

Nothing will come of this if our congresscritters don't hear enough buzz from the grassroots, so get the info, get out there and buzz! (Or, sting 'em come election day.)


Nice!

Download Opera Opera 8.5!

Up until yesterday (yeh, I checked all the download sites), I was using the latest beta of the Opera Browser, version 8.2 (the latest release version was in the 8.0x range). Betaware from Opera has always been, in my experience, better than most beta software, usually more stable than most “final version” MessySoft software.  Heh

But when I saw a coupla squibs at NIF, I figured I’d toodle on over and download the latest Opera build. First, of course, was the info that version 8.5 was available (a day after I’d last checked-heh).  And then there was this lil taunt of Mozilla by Symantec: “Mozilla browsers more vulnerable than IE”  Oops. :~)

Yeh, well, I don’t much use either Internet Exploder or Firedfox.  A brief changelog of features from Opera 8.02 (the latest release version before yesterday) to 8.5 is available here.  I don’t see a note saying they’ve kept the great Bittorrent support that was improved in 8.2beta, but I’ll check that out later.

Something new? No ads. I don’t notice it so much, cos I had simple text ads configured for the upper right-hand corner, but I’m sure I can find use for that tiny lil space.  Otherwise, I’m sure I’ll appreciate the ability to “fix” broken websites’ java on the fly and “User JavaScript, which allows you to apply your own enhancements and fixes to Web pages.” Promises to make visiting some sites less irritating. Heh

Download Opera

It's at the top of my blogroll for a reason

h.t. GM's Corner for the graphic.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

The sky is falling! The sky is falling!

Via Outside the Beltway(via a detour offa NIF, I think)


Hurricane Center May Run Out of Names

Yeh, right.  Too snooty (or too dumb) to even use the whole alphabet.  I mean, maybe the ACLU oughta get in the act and sue the Hurricane Center for sumthin’ er other , ya think? What’s this about not using q, u, x, y and z? What’s that all about, anyway?

Gee, it's such a shame that because the folks in the Hurricane Center (whatever the heck that is) are subliterate goons that we'll never have a hurricane name Quentin or one named Queenie or Quiana (cousin to Lakeesha, with the big fat butt).

And why can't a hurricane be name Xerxes or Xavier or Xanthus?  And why no Ubu or Uma? What'sa madda, can't they spell or pronounce Yates or Yardley or even Yoko, Yuki, Yvette or Yvonne?

Yeh, and I'll sure bet that Zarina, Zena or Zenobia (not to mention Zachariah, Zachary or Zane) would simply blow some small-minded fuses somewhere—probably in the heads of some Mass Media Podpeope called upon to attempt reading such names.

Feh. They say if they run outa names from their list of names starting with letters they’ve allowed, they’ll what, “go to the Greek alphabet”?
Come on.  How many of y’all have the Greek alphabet on your computers (Symbol font doesn't count--it's crappy)? How many of y’all can hardly wait to hear some blow-dried airhead Mass Media Podperson attempt, Deianira or Erytheia or Ixion, Jorisr or Kirillosr? (And yeh, I’d pay to see lackwit Mass Media Podpeople attempting to read Greek text in Greek lettering, preferably all uncials... *sigh*).

A pox on them all.

Support the Troops—and their mission

Via Red Hot Cuppa Politics

Support_the_Troops
Red State has the details.

Sizzle vs. Steak?

Form follows function

Keep that in mind. I’m going to apply it in several different ways, but the connection to things, events, processes around you is something you’ll need to make on your own.

Form follows function.  It’s a central principle of good design.  For example, if a car body is designed without taking into account wheel travel and range of motion, there’s a good chance that, while it may look cool, it won’t drive right.

Simple, eh?  But it’s more than that, of course. Once mechanical aspects are taken into account, the form will affect the way something is used or interacted with by people in different ways. A minivan and a sports car are both designed to transport people, but that lil 2-seater Miata has its form designed for its function as fun transport, a playtoy, the same as the minivan’s form follows it’s designed function—getting a carload of kids to soccer practice and back safely.

The Bauhaus style of architecture was designed to suit a philosophy that viewed people as interchangeable cogs in an industrial society, and its blank, boxy, depersonalized look is well suited to inhabitation by blank, depersonalized cogs in an industrialized society (which is why it’s so damned ugly). See in apposition the gothic architecture that was designed around an entirely different philosophy: designed to inspire, to draw the eye, the heart, the mind upwards.

Form follows function: slutty womens/girls fashions ("Yeh, baby!") designed to say loudly and clearly: “Here I am, nothing but a sex object.  Grab some ass, honey!”  It’s not just displays of flesh. No, it’s the crude display of secondary sex characteristics in a way designed to encourage men to think the least of the wearer, to see them as nothing but hookups for letting off a little sexual tension.

Yeh, baby, you’ve come a long way… Wanna come on back?  

Go ahead.  Apply the form… function principle to politics. Entertainment. Work. Family. Language.

Haphazard or not; designed for and by ourselves or not, our lives are strictured, pushed, tugged and stalled by the design of many, many elements that we normally don’t even think about.

Count on it.  Someone(s) is(are) thinking about the designs that influence your life. Wouldn’t it be a good idea to look into those designs for yourself?  Maybe you can make some modifications that would be more to your taste and suit who you are.

Sand in the gears…

Houston, we have a problem...

Earth to Nzinga, Earth to Nzinga; come in Nzinga…

Just listen to this to put yourself in the right frame of mind to watch this.

Un. Be. Lieveable. Lost in “the mother ship” somewhere, no doubt…

*tink tink*

[NOTE: while this isn't my best post, by far—not even this week—it does contain my fav snarky graphic from any time in recent memory. It's the second one in the post below... BTW, Note the linkfest at Stop the ACLU this weekend.] Hellooooo! Has anyone checked Jean Fraud sKerry’s* hearing aid batteries, recently? (*The birth name of that mountebank known as “John F. Kerry)

Or, is he just completely tone-deaf and/or scared spitless [original word redacted]? What is in his records that he refuses to have them truly made public? The more he stalls, stonewalls and lies about releasing his records, the more it seems possible that he has something truly devastating to hide…

Or is it that he is simply to stupid to see how his behavior plays, too tone deaf to his own words to hear how they sound?

free180_02 Image courtesy of LindaSog.com

TMH’s Bacon Bits mini-fisks a speech Jean Fraud gave at Brown University the other night, pointing out once again the sub-par intellect and tone deaf thinking of Teddy-the-Lesser. Methinks Jean Fraud needs to enroll in an ESL course. Here’s the outstanding thought of the Junior Blowhard from Taxachussetts quoted by TMH:

The incompetence of Katrina’s response is not reserved to a hurricane. There’s an enormous gap between Americans’ daily expectations and government’s daily performance.

What a maroon. (If it passes you by, give yourself a break: coffee deprivation can do that sort of thing to a person. See TMH’s snarky mini-fisk of the statement above.)

But anywho… *sigh* Why do pols like sKerry get away with this sh— crap? Passing off subliterate, inane comments as “thoughtful” and “insightful”—you know, “nuanced”? Well, subliterate voters, malinformed** by a Mass Media Podpeople’s Army determined to remake reality in their own image, allow sKerry and his ilk to get away with lies, obfuscations, obscurantisms and other deliberate deceptions as well as simply world-class stupid remarks like the one above.

Nah, what’s needed now (and for the protection—or perhaps restoration?—of the republic) is an army of folks who will pledge themselves to the principle: No More Bullshit from politicians.

No More sKerry Bullshit2
Jean Fraud sKerry would be out of a job, for sure.

Join the advance guard of that army by joining in the Free John Kerry’s 180 blogburst.  Just  visit Cao’s Blog for instructions. And check out some of the others (listed under Free John Kerry’s 180 in my sidebar).

**no, not misinformed: malinformed because it’s at least in part deliberate and almost always harmful

One eye open... forklift at work on the other one.

Yep. Another one of those days when I am greatly blessed by the Holy Brew. (I really need the 3-point IQ boost each cuppa joe gives me today!)

O Blessed Holy Caffeine Tree O Blessed Holy Caffeine Tree —performance by the Morning Coffee and Afternoon Tea Chorale

O Blessed Holy Caffeine Tree, In gratitude I sing of thee, For all the ways you give life zest, O Caffeine Tree, you are the best! Amen.

Monday, September 19, 2005

"Pork, pork, pork, pork: a pirate's life for me"—anonymous congresscritter

porkbusters Aye, one o' the hidden costs o' pork barrel spendin':
"[Senator Kit] Bond says that when he entered the Senate in 1987, Missouri received only 76 cents for every dollar sent in taxes. The new bill will provide 98 cents, and Bond will push for more. Full parity would return 100 cents expressed as a percentage of total funding; not as many actual dollars will be recycled because of inevitable costs of handling in Washington."
Ahoy, in ither words, launderin' money collected as highway taxes in Missouri through Washin'ton D.c. means that e'en if Missouri has e'ery dollar it collected for expenditure on highways "returned" it still loses, cos the real purpose o' the Federal bureaucracy is full employment o' Federal bureaucraps. Listen to th' bureaucraps say, "Ye'll ne'er get me buried booty!" Aye, it seems t' me that at the 'ery least, those "handlin' costs" could be eliminated by Not funnelin' thin's through the feds. Gar. Aye, surely e'en that little would have a beneficial effect when it came time for federal expenditures for thin's like Katrina. (Aye, they might need t' spend less cos more was already already at the state le'el, for one thin'. Aye, me parrot concurs— e'en parrots have the better o' politicians, it seems.) See GM Roper and Michelle Malkin Arrr, for more extensi'e presentations o' how t' handle pork better, and a call t' identify pork in your own state so that you can contact your congresscritters and politely suggest that those funds be di'erted t' Katrina relief. Aye. Arrr, tis' a good thin' Me'd be thinkin'

Ahoy! Th' friends o' th' jolly Third World County™. Gar.

tlapdbanner2 Ahoy, talk like a pirate, all day long. Ye'll ne'er get me buried booty! Aye, let the trackbacks begin, gar! Arrr, har's one from Woody at Woody's News and Views Aye. Arrr, and har's a new mate at Horizon Zero. Gar. Aye, tis' not piratical, but tis' lootin'. Click o'er t' Boudicca's Voice t' see what wasn't worth lootin' at Walmart. Gar, Where can I find a bottle o'rum? Gar, and whate'er you do, be sure you don't misst' Pants Based Random Pirate Phrase Generator (PBRPPG) h.t. t' th' original "Talk Like a Pirate Day" pirate. Aye, Christine o' Mornin' Coffee and Afternoon Tea chimes in with some pirate treats, gar! There's me grog! Kat, at Keep the Coffee Comin', has the well-known (well, well-known t' anyone who's been t' Disneyland or Disney World in the last 20+ years or so, Me imagine) Disney 'ersion o' Yo, Ho a Pirate's Life for Me, up as her offerin' for TLAP Day. Arrrr! Arrr, Diane (at, uhm, Diane's Stuff, o' course) has her Talk Like A Pirate Day post up, includin' a link t' translate whole web pages int' pirate-speak. (Gar, gimme my rum!) Aye, well, although the posts themsel'es didna show due rev'rence t' TLAPD, the comments sections for these posts get int' the spirit at Dr. Phat Tony's and at GM's Corner Yo Ho! And, o' course, thar's this post by The Dread Pirate Richard at Random Rambling (Aye, sorry it took so long t' get the link up, bub. Gar, Where'd me bottle o'rum go agin? :-) Aye, trackback t' this post (or any other "pirate" post) with yer own piratical fare, 'n I'll link ye up fore har. (Aaarrhhh, me parrot!) Fail t' trackback 'n ye'll ne'er get me buried booty Arr. Aye, 'n for a little fun, me heartys, har's a link t' a pirate chantey for ye from Tom Smith: "Talk Like a Pirate Day" (Note: opens in a new window and plays with any properly-configured mp3 software.)

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Keelhaul 'em!

[Introducing guest poster, Cap'n Ozark] Capn Ozark Arrrr! Scurvy dogs! Homeland Security gi'es a free pass t' illegal aliens and is still snubbin' Minutemen who seek t' be good citizens and help protect our borders. Aye. Aye, click the links abo'e an' below for more info on foreign outlaws gettin' a pass from Homeland Security Aye. Arrr, "Homeland Security"? Keelhaul 'em. They're good for nothin' but cabin boys on garbage scows, Me say. Aye, me parrot concurs. Arrr. (This has been a Piratical Production™ for Guard the Borders) Aye, and har's the jolly crew o' Guard the Borders A pence for an old man o'de sea? Euphoric Reality** TMH's Bacon Bits** Part-Time Pundit** Social Sense Cao's Blog Ogre's Politics and Views In The Bullpen Ravings of a Mad Tech America Is Not A Pinata! NIF Kender's Musings Gribbit's Word** NYgirl** Team Swap** Curley's Corner [Arrr, updated t' include the blogroll for Guard the Borders Aye.]

It's the right thing to do

What's the REAL reason the terrorists at Guantanamo are engaging in a hunger strike?

A Precision Guided Humor Assignment from the Alliance of Free Blogs

Yeh, minor Mass Media Podpeople-generated kerfuffle. It’s really so simple, I kinda hate to burst the bubble. *sigh* You see, someone finally slipped up and actually tortured some of the Gitmo detainees.  Yep. Showed a video of Michael Moore-on accepting an Oscar for his last “great” mockumentary to recieve a fraudulent Oscar (even the bowling was fake) and ever since, those who saw that face, that body, have not been able to keep any food down.  They’re losing sleep (it’s the nightmares), and becoming inexorably more sane.  Naturally, this has only increased their self-hatred and… now they cannot bear to do anything that would prolong their own existence.

For once in their lives they are doing the right thing. The only kind, decent, honorable thing to do would be to honor their desire to end their own lives by starvation.

Treasure the moment...

Avast me hearties!

Tomorrow’s International Talk Like a Pirate Day!

Arrgghhhh!

Fo Gigure

THIS POST LEFT INTENTIONALLY BLANK

Saturday, September 17, 2005

The grass ain't really blue, but it's close

Well, it may seem a lil clunky, may be less than wholly reliable and may just be around for a short while, like so many of these things seem to be, when I saw but Putfile mentioned at Dr. Phat Tony’s, I knew it fit my three criteria for a website/software I needed to check out:

  • It promises to do something I need to do, want to do or at least have some sort of peripheral interest in doing (pretty broad, eh? ;-)

  • It is easily accessible/usable, no matter which of my computers I access it from

  • It fits with my “I’ll pay whatever I have to for what I need, but everything else better be as darned near free as can be” criterion.

So, signed up. Made an mp3 from a wav file I’d recorded and uploaded that.  Oops.  Upload failed the first time.  Server error.  Tried again.  Says it worked.  Let’s see how the code that’s supposed to load it works.

Click here to listen to "Lifes-Railway-to-Heaven"
BTW, this is an example of the kind of music that can easily be found in America’s Third World County™.  I just took an old 19th Century gospel tune that some of the old folks around here like a lot and kinda Bluegrassed it up a lil.  It’s kinda repetitive.  If I have the time someday, I’ll spend time polishing it, adding a tad more variation, etc.

Recorded with Roland Soundcanvas (SC-1).

Friday, September 16, 2005

"Why is everybody always pickin' on me?"

(No, I’m not “Bloodhound Gang”)

Trub. The sediment of life hosts this week’s Carnival of the Recipes.

And ya know, aside from  misspelling my blog’s name, it’s a mighty fine job of presentation—and some mighty fine recipes. And, ah, well, Jeff gets a bye for the blogname typo, cos he said some kind words about my 3-ingredient, one-step recipe for “Sorta Smores”. ;-)

Thanks, Jeff!

Wet Dogblogging

Well, several folks—Christine and Romeocat are prominent examples—do lotsa catblogging, so I thought, here’s the perfect dogblog post.  

S-doo
I saw this thing and the first thing that pooped inna my head was, “Gee, just what I don’t want. This thing’s ridiculous! If I want my car to smell like a dog that’s all wet, all I hafta do is give one of The Boys a bath and stick him in the car.” Besides, as Lovely Daughter says, ya wouldn't want Scooby-Doo staring back at you from your rear view mirror. Ruh-roh! Mostly crossposted at Cathouse Chat

Life in a Third World County™ homestead

In which Lovely Daughter encounters a Cluebat

The other day I was scrubbing a pan I’d thoughtlessly burned a buncha rice in. Took real skill. The rice-burning, that is.  Have some lovely cast-iron-core stainless steel pots n pans.  Heat the water (a lil less than for other pans), dump in the rice, twirls the lid, turn the heat down to nearly nothing and 20 minutes later, perfectly cooked rice.

Well, I’d done all but the last, turning the pan down, and left to run a short errand (cos food cooked in these pans the proper way just almost can’t burn). Been doing this sorta thing with these pans for more than 25 years, so no problem.

Except, I hadn’t turned the pan down… *sigh*

So, there I was cleaning the “blackened rice” off of this otherwise beautiful cooking utensil. [See the light bulb go off?] Dropped into the garage for a sec.  Picked up my cordless drill and a scouring disk attachment.  Back at the sink, whirring away.

Lovely Daughter sees me cleaning the pan with my drill. “You’re weird, Dad.”

Gee.  What was your first clue, Sherlock?

Thursday, September 15, 2005

all-purpose blogburst post

The Spaghetti Western all-purpose blogburst


The Good: Guard Our Borders

Minutemen help in Katrina relief by Filling Gaps in Border Patrol (Go Minutemen!)

The Bad:

Notice Regarding I-9 Documentation Requirements for Hiring Hurricane Victims (Hint: Homeland Security’s not gonna be requiring employers to check for green cards, cos naturally folks’d be too stupid to have theirs with ‘em)

And the Ugly: STOP the ACLU

ACLU defends foreign outlaws (. Yep, they wanna take your job, spread disease, and blow you up. For the ACLU, what’s not to like?

And the really yoogly!

Jean Fraud sKerry’s Green Card Still Missing: Kerry thought to be illegal alien from the Crab Nebula (heh—where’s your 180 info, Johnnie baby? Whatcha hiding? Free John Kerry’s 180!)

This has been a production of the STOP the ACLUGuard Our BordersFree John Kerry’s 180-Blogbursts. (So two of ‘em are late. *sigh* I’ll do better next time.  Stop with the rubber hoses, already!)

(OK, who’ve I forgotten? Oh, right: Madeline Kahn singing “I’m Tired” in Blazing Saddles. I knew there was something.)

[And my apologies for posting earlier with most of the links not included. Just saw my faux pas… )

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Light posting

Surely you jest (“Don’t call me Shirley”)

Light blogging, indeed.  Missed two important blogbursts. *sigh* Maybe I’ll fit ‘em in today.


I’ll be in and out today so I thought I’d go for something a lil different. I haven’t taken/made the time to get the tech squared away in my head, so I’ll have to come on back and do it manually, but here goes. Diane, at Diane’s Stuff (what else? ;~) posted a long-winded story that depends on a groaner of a pun. Love it. I’ll probably post my fav in a sec, here.

The deal:

Post your fav pun-groaner of a story, either in comments here or on your blog. If in comments here, I’ll bring it “out front” with full credit (or blame) for you.  If on your blog, trackback and I’ll bring the tracked back link out front here. A lil mini-open links post kinda deal.

OK: a fav story with hook or punchline a groaner of a pun.

This, reproduced from a Wikipedia article on shaggy dog stories, is a version of my fav (and saves me from having to type the thing out):
Well into his career, Quasimodo, most famous and accomplished of Notre Dame bellringers, died in his sleep. As he was not the best-liked of individuals, mourning was brief, and afterward the church was left sans bellringer. Quasimodo had been working there for quite a long time, and as such the priests did not know how to go about looking for a replacement. After much deliberation, they decided to hold an audition.
Notre Dame being such a prestigious cathedral, people came from far and wide to audition for the job of bellringer. The priests were stunned; they hadn't expected such response. They got to the tedious labor of interviewing each of the would-be ringers, and continued at it for an entire month before finally reaching the end of the line. By this point, they were extremely disheartened: every last one of the applicants they had interviewed thus far was nothing less than awful at bellringing. The last one, from a single look alone, promised to be no improvement: he had no arms!
As frustrated as they were, the prospect of a no-armed bellringer was amusing to the priests, so instead of simply dismissing him they put him through the interview process. "Do you have any experience in the field of bellringing?" they asked. "I've worked at several churches and cathedrals throughout Europe," he told them, "and all of the priests I have worked with will be happy to provide references." This intrigued the priests, so they probed further. "How do you ring the bells, with no arms?" Unfazed, he told asked, "May I demonstrate?" They brought him up to the bell-tower. He stood back from one of the bells, bent down, and ran at it, striking it with his face, then repeating this with the other bells, producing the most beautiful music the priests had ever heard. They hired him on the spot.
Things went swimmingly for several months. Every morning the bellringer woke up early to ring the bells, creating unique music and helping to maintain Notre Dame's place as the foremost of France's cathedrals. The citizens loved his music, and everything was fantastic. Then, one day, there was a tragic accident. The bell ringer backed up, as usual, and ran at the bell- but missed it entirely. He charged out of the tower, falling to his death.
As his body laid on the street below, a crowd began to gather. The individuals surrounding him muttered amongst themselves: nobody knew who he was. "Who is this?" was the question on everyone's lips. "Whose body is this?" Someone finally piped up:
"I don't know, but his face sure rings a bell."
So Notre Dame was once again out a bellringer. The audition process had ended up working out well for the priests the previous time, so they decided to hold a second audition. Once again, people came from far and wide to audition for the honor of being the person to ring Notre Dame's bells. As a matter of fact, most of them were the same people, undaunted by their previous failures. The priests once again went down the line, interviewing the applicants one by one, only to find that once again they were all simply terrible. Finally they reached the last person in line. Once again, they were shocked to find that he had no arms. What was more, he bore a striking resemblance to the previous bellringer.

"That's funny," said one of the priests. "You look a lot like the last guy we had in here!" The interviewee replied, "Well, I ought to! He was my brother!" His list of credentials was even longer than the last man's, and the music (which he played in much the same manner) was even more beautiful. Of course, they hired him immediately. Once again, things went great for several months, and the priests thanked God for their good fortune in finding not one but two such gifted individuals. But, just like the last time, one day there was an accident. The bellringer backed up, ran at the bell, missed it, and fell out of the tower, landing on his face and dying instantly.

Once again, a puzzled crowd gathered around the body on the street. "Who is this?" they asked. "Who has died in the street?" Nobody seemed to know. This went on for some time, until someone finally interjected:

"I don't know his name, but he's a dead ringer for his brother!"


There ya are.  Any takers for more contributions?
Dr. Phat Tony offers this lil groaner in comments (note: it works much better when you sing the punchline... and no, I'm not telling you what tune, yet. Think 40s-era swing)
One morning Roy Rogers woke up early to make use of his new running shoes he had just bought. He told Dale Evans that he was going to try them out by running around the neighborhood and would be back in an hour. Dale Evans was just finishing breakfast, when Roy Rogers burst into the house looking like he had been caught in a thresher from the knees down. Dale asked, "Roy, what happened to your legs and wear are your new shoes?" Roy responded, "I was running along and I was attacked by a mountain lion. The cougar scratched, clawed, and bit at my new shoes. I was lucky to escape alive. We have to go back out there and find that mountain lion before anyone else gets hurt." So, Roy and Dale left their house in search of the shoe hating mountain lion. As they were clearing a hill, Dale Evans spots a mountain lion, turns to Roy and says, (in song) "Pardon me Roy is that the cat that chewed your new shoes?"
And another from DPT:
To get the full effect, this should be read aloud. You will understand what 'tenjewberrymuds' means by the end of the conversation. The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service, at a hotel in Asia, which was recorded and published in the Far East Economic Review: Room Service (RS): "Morrin. Roon sirbees." Guest (G): "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service." RS: "Rye..Roon sirbees..morrin! Jewish to oddor sunteen??" G: "Uh..yes..I'd like some bacon and eggs." RS: "Ow July den?" G: "What??" !RS: "Ow July den?...pryed, boyud, poochd?" G : "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please." RS: "Ow July dee baykem? Crease?" G: "Crisp will be fine." RS : "Hokay. An Sahn toes?" G: "What?" RS:"An toes. July Sahn toes?" G: "I don't think so." RS: "No? Judo wan sahn toes??" G: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo wan sahn toes' means." RS: "Toes! toes!...Why jew don juan toes? Ow bow Anglish moppin we bodder?" G: "English muffin!! I've got it! You were saying 'Toast.' Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine." RS: "We bodder?" G: "No...just put the bodder on the side." RS: "Wad?" G: "I mean butter...just put it on the side." RS: "Copy?" G: "Excuse me?" RS: "Copy...tea...meel?" G: "Yes. Coffee, please, and that's all." RS: "One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin we bodder on sigh and copy....rye??" G: "Whatever you say." RS: "Tenjewberrymuds." G : "You're very welcome."
OK, so it's not dependent on a pun, but Woody's trackback with this morality play of a tale that I just can't pass up. I just bet family reuinions are fun in that family...