It's the little things...

Curmudgeon mode: ON Ever notice that sometimes it's the little things that are most irritating? "Big things" are sometimes—sometimes—less of an irritant than little things. Threre's a BIG difference between the death of a loved one and someone pulling out into traffic and driving slowly in front of folks who have sonmewhere to go. The death of a loved on isn't irritating, though. And, really, we all know that we and our loved ones will die one day, but there's no excuse for pulling out into traffic and driving slowly... (I just irritated myself by misspelling "traffic". Twice. Ick. Misspelled "driving" too. *sigh*) :-) One of the "little things" I find to be irritating is when I ask someone why they did such and so and they essentially tell me, "The King of Spain told me to do [something completely irrelevant to your question]." Huh? I didn't ask you about [something completely irrelevant], I asked you about such and so. And what does your stated reason have to do with anything under the sun? It's as though with their answer they were saying, 1.) "Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah [fingers in ears], nahhhht listening to you." 2.) "You're so stupid, you'll never notice my answer is complete nonsense." 3.) "Huh? If this is Tuesday [or Wednesday, Thursday, Friday... etc.], I must have my head up my... " 4.) "Hey! Ever seen my impression of Edgar Allan Poe on Prozac? 'Pretty bird... '." ...or any combo of the above. *sigh* If someone doesn't want to answer a question, the honest way to deal with it is, "I don't want to answer that." If they don't understand the question, "Could you rephrase that?" If they didn't hear it, "Could you repeat the question?" Babbling nonsense is insulting. But slowly, very slowly, I am learning that pointing out to such people what they have done is useless, a complete waste of my time. (Not a waste of their, cos they're already doing that.) Well, since it's August and I've already seen Christmas products out in one store (yep: there's another rant), perhaps I can let Bill Engvall talk about some "little" irritants and a program to address them: Here's Your Sign Christmas I took my son to the mall the other day to see Santa Claus The woman in line behind me says "hey is that Santa Claus up there"? I said "no ma'm, it's a Kenny Rodgers stunt double" Here's your sign The other day I bought a wreath to go on our front door as I was walking out the store a man stopped me and said "hey, are you going to hang that on your door"? I said "no sir, it's a Christmas toilet seat cover, got the idea from Martha Stewart" (Chorus) Here's your sign, Here's your sign, Here's your stupid sign You acted dumb, so have some fun and wear your stupid sign Oh! Here's your sign, Here's your sign, Here's your stupid sign you lost your mind, so pay the fine and wear your stupid sign I hung those little Christmas lights on my house, you know the kind that blink on and off My neighbour comes over and says "Bill how do you get those to blink on and off like that"? I said "I've got my son inside plugging and unplugging it, plugging and unplugging it" Here's your sign I took my family to buy a Christmas tree the other night When we walked onto the lot this guy walked up to me and says "hey, y'all here to buy a Christmas tree?" I said, "no sir, my son needs to go to the bathroom and these trees looked really inviting" (Chorus) Here's your sign, Here's your sign, Here's your stupid sign You acted dumb, so have some fun and wear your stupid sign Oh! Here's your sign, Here's your sign, Here's your stupid sign you lost your mind, so pay the fine and wear your stupid sign Here's your sign, Here's your sign, Here's your stupid sign have no fear when you're spreading cheer during Christmas time The other night my family and I were walking through the neighbourhood looking at all the Christmas decorations when we came across this house that had a manger scene now there was this whole group of people looking at it when I overheard this one guy say "hey, are those the Three Wise Men"? I said "no sir that's ZZ Top doing a farming concert (Chorus) Here's your sign, Here's your sign, Here's your stupid sign You acted dumb, so have some fun and wear your stupid sign Oh! Here's your sign, Here's your sign, Here's your stupid sign you lost your mind, so pay the fine and wear your stupid sign Here's your sign, Here's your sign, here's your stupid sign (have no fear when you're spreading cheer during Christmas time) And finally my wife and I were in a grocery store the other day and I heard a woman ask the clerk "do you know what time Midnight Mass starts on Christmas Eve"? And in the holiday spririt I walked over and said "Here's your sign" Happy holidays everybody! Curmudgeon mode: OFF (maybe... )