Sympathy for the Devil
From the depths of my most charitable being I offer this sympathy card to the wounded Abu Musab al-Zarqawi...
To: Abu Musab al-Zarqawi
(I've addressed this to you in Malawi,
Cos I hear you're running
From folks who're gunning
For you, for a lark on safari.)
Your wounds may be sorely pressing,
And even, perhaps, quite distressing,
But I take hope in this,
You insufferable piss-
They've poisoned your surgical dressing.
So, as your wounds fill with puss,
We'll charter a big Grehound bus
To haul in the tourists
(We need no jurists)
To jeer as you whine, moan and fuss.
Your passing will leave us distressed,
For really, in case you've not guessed,
We all think it fitter
You suffer long, bitter
Agonies; yes, that is best.
(Yeh, it's doggerel. What? I'm going to spend time polishing actual poetry for that scabrous, mangy dog?)